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speak up dear

you can come and take me away
Adora Brenda Cassandra Elenore Elsie Gerald Hui Min Hui Yu Isabelle Iman Ivy Jia Jun Jia Min Jolene Li Ping Li Ying Michaela MCB Nicholas Ninnart Pamela Rahman Rizzal Serene Sheena Shermaine Siew Voon Timotheus Valerie Vanessa Wan Ling Wen Qi Winnie Win Ting Yoke Ching Yong Xiang Yue Yang Yuen Chung Xue Ting

in the end you're gone
February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010

I held the pen and started writing my story.
Too simple to describe, too shallow to carve out a definiton, too many reasons I can't tell, too much complications you can't comprehend. I need a sign, to keep me going, to sustain this life that's so battered.

Friday, March 6, 2009 @ 10:51 PM
no ray of hope, no light inside

To think that I actually pon once my favourite subject remedial.
To think that I actually stoned at the theatrette for so long and only wrote a few sentences for my Chinese essay.

Ran out of the theatrette secretly when Chenlaoshi said our essay must be a minimum of 500 words. I went to the band room and wondered if I should turn up for Physics remedial. So Mandy played scissors-paper-stone with me and I would have to go if I lose. Yeah I lost.

But I still insisted not to go.

I went down to canteen happily with ChuXian and Elenore to have lunch and saw the group of 4G boys.

"Hawhaw you die already I going to tell MrYeo!"

Whatever. K guess what. I met my Chenlaoshi and started lecturing me. Then I received texts from Nic and LiPing that Mr Prem would be taking 4G for Phy remedials.

I continued enjoying my yongtaufoo.

Great. Now I have to hand in the work that they did and a parent's letter by 7.30am on Monday.

当你撒了一个谎言后,你必须再撒谎来掩护自己。

I so wanna strike an A1 for O Level Chi when I just write a few sentences for my essay. I so wanna get a single digit in N Level when I'm skipping remedials.

'Study hard k!'
'Must pass N Level with flying colours to go up Sec5'
'No sleeping during lessons'
'Cannot skip remedials ah'

The last words you ever spoke still echo in my head. But I just lost all the motivation to study.

Ah fuck this all.